By Jackie Helm

 

Let’s get ready to rummmbbbble!  Last night on Ochocinco:  The Ultimate Catch, Chad took both the Blue and Red Teams to the beach to play football.  Everyone played except for Tara, Ericka and Laurice who all think they’re too cool for school.  As expected, Tara provided the comedic commentary for the game.

 

April (personal trainer) brought out her big guns to impress Chad with her athletic ability.  She also went above and beyond to be at his every beck and call.  When his pants got wet by the waves, April bent down to roll them up!  Tara even clowned Chad and stated that he looked like Jiminy Cricket in his banana slacks!

 

 

The last match-up to finally get a 1:1 date from the Blue Team was Tiphani and Brittany.  It was their lucky day as they went shopping at Rock and Republic!  Brittany found an outfit right away, which gave her more time with Chad.  As Chad was bent over, Brittany made doggy-style motions behind him.  Chad remarked that it was rude of him to not have a shirt on in the store.  Brittany said that it was rude of her to not have panties on in the store.  Brittany’s engine is apparently running hot.  Later at dinner, she also asked Chad when he last had sex.  Chad then referred to his penis as Russell the Love Muscle that is an occasional blessing to “people that he deals with”.  Brittany apparently hopes to get on that list soon.

 

The last match-up to finally get a 1:1 date from the Red Team was April and Laurice.  It was not their lucky day as Chad took ladies to the laundry mat.  Yes, the laundry mat!  The girls gathered their dirty gear and got an over dramatized lesson on clothes washing from Chad.  The next stop was for food…right outside the door.  The low budget date continued as Chad’s choice of food was from the Sweet Truck parked outside.  They divulged their delicatessens on a picnic bench in the parking lot!  But it did have a table cloth on it.  All of this went down with April nervously piping up wherever she could, thus making herself appear too anxious.  Chad finally made up for this faux pas evening and gifted the ladies with beautiful jeweled necklaces.

 

Back at the house, Chad continued the new tradition of getting the competitors opinions on the ladies who are up for eliminations.  Everyone weighed in on who they thought was the better pick within the two match-ups.  Jasmine made it a point to inform Chad that Laurice is a follower.  Jasmine described Tara as a puppeteer, who influences questionable behavior.  Naturally, Tara’s response was falling out in laughter!  As Tara left the room, she mimicked a puppeteer as though she were making Ericka walk using invisible strings. 

 

Elimination time!  Chad informed us that we would be seeing B’Twice for the last time as the 2010 football season is upon us!  Not that B’Twice does much anyway.  But he was nice to look at.  Good luck B’Twice!!!

 

Laurice and April

 

Red Teams match-up Laurice and April were the first to receive Chad’s scrutiny. Chad noted that April was trying wayyyy too hard.  And he let her go.  Chad called Laurice out on the need to be her own  person.  And he let her go! 

 

Show shocker!  Both girls in the Red Team match up were sent packing!  How does this work for the bracket system you ask?  Chad answered that with “it’s his game, he makes the rules”. From the Blue Team match-up, neither Tiphani nor Brittany was eliminated and Brittany just slid her photo over in the Red Team winners spot.  Clear as mud?  Good!  Chad sent his apologies for messing up the viewers’ office pool!  The competition is getting slim!  My money is still on Rubi to win!

 

 

Ochocinco: The Ultimate Catch airs Sundays at 9/8c on VH1.

 

(Image courtesy of VH1)

 

Follow Jackie at twitter.com/justjackieshow