by Sam McMillen

The Amazing Race 15

This week on The Amazing Race, the teams stick around for another dose of French winter. It's freezing at the pit-start, so a warm and cozy Mercedes Benz is quite the treat once the leg starts. Teams leave from Veroun and head to Reims where they find the only outdoor statue of Joan of Arc. A woman playing a singing saw (YouTube it... pretty fascinating) gives them a cork with their next clue on the bottom. Teams go underground for the Roadblock and build upward for the Detour, getting lost every possible chance along the way. At the pit-stop, the teams are greeted by Phil and a French mime, making for a quiet, peaceful ending to a very disoriented leg.

WAIT... YOU GUYS ARE DETECTIVES?

The Race is famous for casting teams with unique but relatable qualities. How often these "titles" come out is up to the racers. Mike and Louie make the most references to their personal life this season. They discuss how their ability to withstand inconsistent sleeping patterns and filthy clothes stems from their days on the force. It's charming, don't get me wrong, but I doubt finding grapes in a vineyard and crack-cocaine in someone's rear-end are really THAT relatable. Dan and I always got a kick out of how Phil tried to relate our being gay with some of the challenges. "So how did being gay brothers help you guys navigate the route this leg?" Well Phil, I'm glad you asked. Reading street signs in Dubai is covered on the first day of gay training.

THE BIG CONFUSION

The obscure clues this week (the cork and the champagne bottle test tube) were definitely pretty tough, especially with the lack of English spoken by the locals. After the Roadblock, the teams must find La Maquetterie Taittanger. Little do they know, there is another Taittanger (not La Maquetterie) in Reims where they started this leg of the Race. The one they are looking for is in Pierry. The majority of the teams go to the wrong location first, so no one's game is completely destroyed by the misdirection. The navigation was so bad this week, I was having trouble keeping track of who was on track and who was somewhere in Swaziland. Jet and Cord were unlucky enough to go to the wrong city... twice. We had a lot of Oh My Gravies this week.

WALMART PULLS THROUGH AGAIN

It's such a validating feeling when something you packed "just in case" actually saves your butt. For us, it was the $2 calculator we picked up at Wal-Mart. For Team Stallie this week, it was duct tape. During the leg, Steve rams their Mercedes into a curb, busting the bumper and causing the fender to be pressed against the tire (that's right, I know what a fender is). I totally recognized the look on Allie's face when the accident happens: "my dad's the worst driver in the world, and it will be the death of me". The team pulls over to check it out, only to find their fender in the shape of a snaggletooth. With no success from bending, pulling and twisting the broken piece, Steve remembers the duct tape his wife threw in his pack just before they left. The two maneuver the pieces into place, strap on some duct tape and are saved from elimination. From then on, they were really driving in style.

BAR AND BATMITZVAHS ALL AROUND

I think the funniest blip in this episode was Dan and Jordan talking about their crystal tower. I'll be the first to admit, it was quite the tower. Frankly, I'm impressed they were able to pull such a tough challenge off. Especially with the four single glasses stacked at the very top. Very "Empire State Building". This challenge gets my "cinematography award" with the shot of Jordan's face just behind the tower, watching as the champagne is poured. Give the camera guys an Emmy. Their tower building skills were enough to make me want to convert to Judaism, just so I could hire them for my Bar Mitzvah. Then again, I don't know if my runner-up winnings could afford their expensive services.

BRENT AND CAITE OOPS... AGAIN

In a secret scene for Episode 5, Brent and Caite discuss how they're great on the challenges but just can't seem to get the navigation part down. This week doesn't show much improvement. While searching for the Joan of Arc statue, Brent and Caite are shown just standing there, looking around aimlessly. Brent asks Caite if she wants to ask some locals passing by, and she says no. That one blew my mind (ALWAYS ASK THE LOCALS!). After the Roadblock, the team thinks they catch a break when they spot Carol and Brandy asking for directions. They follow the ladies to the pit-stop, only to realize they have once again skipped a clue. Not just a clue, the entire Detour. They're having a lot of trouble paying attention to detail, and they'll be the first to admit it. I'm very surprised they have avoided elimination with so many huge errors. Their race so far just proves how crucial the navigation aspect of the game is, and how much it helps to travel in packs. Maybe Caite can seek some spiritual guidance from Sir Joan of Arc.

CAROL'S SUPPORT

Brandy volunteers to do the Roadblock, only to find out it is yet again a heights challenge. She seems pretty pissed off at first (this is her third heights task - Carol's avoided them all), but puts her head down and gets the task done. As she is getting ready to enter the cave-o-bubbly, we hear Carol saying "you're gonna have so much fun!" Carol's motivation for such affirmation stuck out to me. While it looked like she was just trying to help her partner calm down, I think she was mostly just trying to keep her from transforming into Super Bitch. So far we've seen that Brandy and Carol can get a bit moody and have trouble recovering a good attitude once things go south. We all remember their G.I. Jane catastrophe of last episode. Don't get me wrong, I'm loving Team "The L Word"; but no one wants to be on a team with Cinderella when her horns come out. Dramafest Leg 6.... nicely avoided.

CONFIDENCE CAN KILL YOU

The most successful teams are the ones who can find a happy medium between playing it safe and taking a risk. Now that Joe's blatant arrogance is gone, a few teams have come out from behind his shadow as a little "cockier" than the other teams. First, Mike and Louie seem a little bit full of themselves. At the beginning of the leg, the detectives talk about how the other teams are "running around like chickens with their heads cut off" and the two are "just enjoying the amusement of these other teams". Be careful guys, that kind of confidence is the quickest way to overlook a HUGE, race-ending mistake. The second team exuding some extra ego is Brandy and Carol. When Caite and Brent follow them to the pit-stop, the ladies roll their eyes at the young couple's mistake, as if to say "ugh... stilly amateurs". The Detectives and Team L Word definitely have the most room to gloat based on their successful track records, but I really feel like their confidence will get the best of both of them.

JOE SCHMO

It seems everyone is quite pleased that Joe and Heidi are gone. In an extra clip, Mike and Louie talk about how the other teams were praising them for their bold U-Turn decision. Dan and Jordan even tell Phil they hoped the detectives got 1st again, probably for eliminating the one team they didn't like. Correction: the one GUY they didn't like - everyone was in love with Heidi. I think Joe's departure is going to mark a new attitude of friendship and alliance between some of the teams. In the end, I'm sure he's a great guy and is a wonderful father/husband when not on the race. For me, I'm just glad we don't have to hear about his knee anymore.

THIS AIN'T THE BIG BROTHER HOUSE

Despite the fact that I really enjoyed Jeff and Jordan's charming banter, it was definitely time for the newly dating couple to go. True, they made for good TV, but they've consistently struggled more than any other team. I now find myself surprised that Jordan never got lost going from the pool to the kitchen in the BB house. The team left the race with a good attitude, kind of giving off the "I'm so glad this is over" vibe as they chat with Phil for the last time. I think they were expecting the race to be a lot easier than it truly is, especially after their days of poolside drinking and relaxation in the BB house. The emotional drain may be equivalent between the two shows, but when you factor in the physical and mental exhaustion associated with TAR, it was too much for them. At least Jeff got to repel into a champagne cellar with Santa Claus.

I'm pretty excited about the remaining 6 teams. My final three picks are still in it (Steve/Allie, Dan/Jordan and Jet/Cord), and I'm still feeling pretty good about all of them. I think the confidence of the lesbians and the detectives will get the best of them, and let's be honest, Brent and Caite's lack of attention to detail isn't very promising. Next week is in gorgeous Seychelles, so I'm looking forward to a nice change in scenery. Ironically, this season's top six consists of three all male teams, two male/female teams and one all female team. Sound familiar?

 

The Amazing Race airs Sundays at 8/7c on CBS.

(Image courtesy of CBS)

 

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