By Andy Sloan

Welcome back to a special double recap edition of Survivor: Worlds Apart... or as I like to call it Survivor: Kelly Becomes Relevant! Much like Shirin, we agree "If I don't try, it'll never happen." Although Shirin maybe talking about pooping, I'm talking about playing the game of Survivor.

So lets combine this double episode into 1 super-stuffed recap with our TOP 7 takeaways!

1. Reward Challenge Numero Uno
****With just 4 minutes into the episode, it's already time for a challenge! It's gotta be good! The layout of reward is nothing new. We've seen it before and we'll see it again. One caller must yell instructions to a blinded duo and bring back certain objects. Yada yada yada.

BUT, Kelly finally gets her first real storyline of the season! After seeing the previews for today's episode and seeing so many people drop the platform incorrectly, I was so on the edge of my seat that I was practically rolling on the floor. Who's medical coming for?

OF COURSE, the one person we haven't seen all season is the one that gets smashed on the head and soaked in a blood-stained buff. I feel bad for laughing, but it happened. Kelly's bleeding out but she and everyone else have to stay blindfolded. What a moment! Kelly hasn't gotten a word in all season so the Survivor Gods tried to slap some sense into her.

After she gets bandaged up, the battle wound proves useless as the No Collars win 3 hens and a rooster, while the White Collars win 10 eggs.

2. To Kill or Not to Kill
****Back at the No Collar tribe, Joe decides to kill one of their prized Hens for Will's birthday. Here I am, eating peanuts and starving to death, meanwhile the people on Survivor are eating better than me. The struggle! BUT HEY, Jenn chooses to starve just like me and finds an immunity idol in the process! #Blessed

But I don't want to talk about the No Collars. I want to talk about the Yahoo Executive who's a bundle of all kinds of crazy.

Shirin comes out saying that she's killed a bunny to prepare her for the game and desensitize her from any animal killings. On paper, this comes across at 60% sane and 40% crazy, but in the show it was just all crazy.

Joaquin gets the comment of the day, labeling Shirin a Sociopath, saying, "Alright psycho, you stay over there." Although I'm sure Shirin hasn't killed a mouse when she was 14, like Joaquin joked, please just keep the machete away from her.

3. "Girls Need to Hold Themselves to a Higher Standard Than Men"
****I'm not sure what exactly I can get away with saying, so I'll put it like this: Rodney is not representing my hometown of Boston very well. A year ago we had Trish mucking up the game in Brains vs. Brawn vs. Beauty, now we have Rodney. Lucky Boston!

Backstory, Rodney got rejected by 2 girls because they apparently didn't think of themselves highly. Then when Rodney goes to clubs, he feels like he can do whatever he wants but girls have to hold themselves to a higher standard. Mmmmk, what a philosophy.

Instead of talking about these comments let me just apologize for the town of Boston. After seeing Rodney's performance in the immunity challenge, you have to take everything he says with a grain of salt. Including when he said, "I'd spank her like a bad baby," when referring to Lindsey mouthing off.

Did I laugh while typing this? That's a definite yes. Get yo-self together Rodney.

4. Blue Collar Books a Date with Jeff
****For the first time this season, the Blue Collars head to tribal council and we finally get to see where the power lies.

Kelly and Mike. Boom. Solid power duo. Kelly may not be on camera a lot, but we can finally see she's been calling the shots. Way to be Kelly!

Rodney on the other hand thinks he's calling the shots. Good, we'll let him think that so he can keep running his mouth and putting a target on his back. Although Rodney may not be the best social player, he makes good TV, so I'll give him that!

As for Dan, he's just there being Dan.

At tribal, we get our first tie of the season! It's Lindsey vs. Sierra vs. Rodney! After a revote, Lindsey becomes the first Blue Collar voted out of Survivor: Worlds Apart. There may be a winner in that tribe, but UNFORTUNATELY it's not her!

5. No (More) Collars
****With each tribe somewhat divided, it's the perfect time for a good ol' Survivor tribe swap. Will's on the bottom of No Collar, Sierra on Blue Collar and White Collar is its usual mess.

On Escameca (aka the jacked tribe): 4 Blue Collars (Sierra, Dan, Mike and Rodney), 2 White Collars (Joaquin and Tyler) and 1 No Collar (Joe).

On Nagarote (aka the mess of a tribe): 3 White Collars (Carolyn, Shirin, Max), 3 No Collars (Jenn, Hali, Will) and 1 Blue Collar (Kelly)

Despite the tribes being completely unequal, each tribe has the potential to make big moves. Sierra is about to shank Dan and Carolyn is about to push of Shirin and Max off some cliffs. Additionally, there are 2 active idols on Nagarote!

6. Blue Collar Struggles
****Mike, Rodney and Dan are wicked worried that Sierra will flip. So OF COURSE, they all go get water and wood together WITHOUT SIERRA. Instead, Sierra is with the 3 exact people they don't want her talking to. WHY?

Then Mike tells Dan he has to apologize for the way he has treated Sierra and Dan completely RUINS it. Dan practically blames the fight they had on both of them and Sierra walks away from the conversation. WHERE IS THE SOCIAL GAME ON THIS TRIBE?

7. White Collar Scramble
****Back at Nagarote, the red tribe completely bombs the immunity. And when I say, "completely bombs," I mean that sight had to be evacuated and labeled a disaster zone.

At camp it seems Kelly is in the power position, choosing between the 3 No Collar or the 3 White Collars. BUT, Carolyn takes the power into her own hands and targets her fellow White Collars, Max/Shirin, completely discounting Kelly's power and pulling the strings herself. WAY TO BE CAROLYN!

For the remaining episode, we get to see Max and Shirin drop their pants, throw out some random Survivor facts and think they have control.

At Tribal, it's a blindside battlefield. Everything is up in the air, but one thing's for certain. "A blindside is putting an end to something that didn't fit in." Shirin, these are your words, and unfortunately you and Max are those who don't fit in. By a vote of 4-2, Max becomes the 5th castaway voted out of Survivor.

THAT'S THE RECAP! WE DID IT! THROW YO HANDS IN THE AIR!

Do you think Lindsey and Max were the right people to go? What are your thoughts on Rodney? Did you picture Dan in Miley Cyrus's Wrecking Ball video as he was smashing pots? Comment below!

Photo credit: CBS