By Mike Bandy

Sheree and Phaedra agreed not to work together, after Sheree felt that Phaedra got outsmarted in court, and Phaedra felt that Sheree didn't pay her quickly enough for her services. But, yay, they're still friends! What a bunch of bull - can anyone else see that these women secretly hate each other, or is it just me?

At any rate, Kim was the real star of the show this episode, because she was getting ready to move into her brand new home. She had an interior decorator come over to talk about what she wanted done, and the woman only had one week to finish. The home is 17,000 square feet, mind you. If I had to work for Kim, I'd drop dead in about twenty minutes. I don't know how Sweetie does it.

Cynthia invited all the ladies to her friend's art gallery opening, and the main storyline here was that Kandi asked Marlo again where she got her money, and Marlo said that she's dated wealthy guys and gotten an allowance from them, and that's the type of guy she goes for. Even if this is true, I'm not sure why Kandi had to pry into Marlo's business so much. Asking once was enough, but bringing it up again and saying that she never gave you an answer?! It's not your business where her money comes from, Kandi!

Cynthia didn't have time to focus on that anyway - she had her own issues to deal with. She was getting excited about the opening of her modeling school, when Peter decided to rain on her parade. Peter reminded her, several times, that she hadn't gotten her invitations out on time, and that probably nobody would show up. While she was getting her makeup done for a power couple photo shoot they were to do together, Cynthia asked Peter to call Mal and ask her to get on sending the invites out right away, which he refused to do. When he finally did get around to do it, he yelled into the phone about how they'd both effed up, and my hatred for him grew to astronomical proportions. Why did Cynthia marry this jerk?! He doesn't seem to support anything she does, and that's only gonna continue. Read on...

It's moving day! Between dealing with the baby, the movers breaking things, and everything else going on, Kim was a nervous wreck. In between a montage of everything that's ever happened in the townhouse, we got to see one wall in the kitchen covered with writing. Apparently, everyone who's ever been to the house wrote on this wall. I mean...why? If somebody came in my house and just started writing on my wall, that would piss me off, no? Anyway, the moving truck closed, and we were on our way...

Then NeNe showed what a good mom she was by telling Bryson about how he has to use condoms, because "he's gonna be 22 years old - he can drink liquor, he can smoke week, he can go to jail, he can do anything!" Not exactly a glowing endorsement of motherhood, is she? And for the record, age has nothing to do with smoking weed - it's illegal no matter how old you are. Duh. Why does this woman continue to pollute the airwaves with her ridiculousness?

Back to Kandi, who was talking with her manager Don Juan (I'm pretty sure that's not his real name) about a new direction she wants to take with her music - country! Kandi said she'd love to work with Shania Twain, Dixie Chicks, Carrie Underwood, and Jodie Messina. Hmm...Kandi as a country artist? I can't imagine.

Then it was time for the big reveal of Kim's new house! The entire inside was opulent, rich, and very very awesome. If you didn't see it, there's barely a way for me to describe it. I will describe the baby's room, though, because it was insane. The entire thing was decked out in brown (ugh), and there were crowns and footballs all over the place. He even had his own bathroom, which, at 4 days old, is an absolute necessity. Overall, Kim was really surprised and happy with the way the house turned out (see photo above), and she still can't believe that her life has turned out this way.

Kandi talked to Jodie Messina on Skype and they agreed to meet at her house in Nashville to go over ideas. We heard a snippet of a country song that Kandi was working on, and it actually sounded pretty good, though still R&B-like. I think I'd definitely check out her country stuff, and I'm not even a big fan. Of country, that is.

Then came the time for Cynthia's modeling school opening, which started off not so great. An assistant called to say that the CD player wasn't working, and that nobody had arrived. Cynthia burst into tears, and Mal asked her what was wrong because she was overly emotional. Jeez, why didn't she just say, "IS IT PETER?!?! IT'S PETER, ISN'T IT?!?!" Mal doesn't want Cynthia's marriage to work out, she's made that painfully obvious, and she's not giving her sister enough credit, because "people don't look at models like they're smart people, or even good business peeper". Don't act like you didn't hear her say "peeper"! Hilarious.

Anyway, when Cynthia, Mal and their mom arrived at the agency, it was packed with people, and the event appeared to be a big success! All the girls arrived, and it was the first time since Cynthia's wedding that Kim and NeNe were in the same room. They didn't even acknowledge each other, and when an argument broke out between Kandi and Marlo about Marlo having a "big poppa" (and yes, Marlo said those words about 9,000 times), Kim decided to take her leave. She's in a different place now, you see, and "these bitches are all about the same old drama". Here, here.

Then Cynthia got up to speak and thanked her sister and her mom, and when she thanked Peter and asked him to come up, he was nowhere to be found. Real supportive guy, eh? I'm serious - I'm gonna start a foundation and call it Leave This Dude Right Effing Now, in the hopes that she will.

Next episode looks like it'll bring a serious talk about Peter and Cynthia's future together...do you think she'll jump on the LTDREN Foundation train? Should Mal back off? Why does NeNe exist? Tell me in the comments - and have a great holiday if you celebrate that sort of thing!

(Image courtesy of Bravo)