by David McAlpine

Last night, we got a little break from the standard Bachelor episode for my personal favorite episode of every season: The Women Tell All special. This is the chance for almost all of the women to come back and kvetch about the season and each other, now that they've seen each other drunkenly talk behind each other's backs. Could this get any better?

Evidently, it could with this cast of girls. Sometimes they're meek and mild and they don't want to say anything. Then there's the times when the really controversial people don't show up, so it's easy to talk about them the whole time.

Not this time, though! Melissa and Raichel were there. Ashley H. was there. Michelle was there. This was about to be a great night.

Chris Harrison kicks it off with an all-too-long conversation with Brad about the season, the women and the final two: Chantal and Emily. Hint: they're not here, therefore we don't care.

Even less important: highlights of other Bachelor reunion parties and people talking about how great it is to be a part of this "family." Of course when you put enough single people who are desperate enough to go on TV for love in one room, you're bound to have people having a good time. It's like a convoluted, dirty-but-not-in-the-same-way version of "The Real World."

Of course, nothing on this show comes without reason. All of a sudden, the contestants bust out the talk of another Bachelor Pad (which, if there is a god, there will be none of), which signals impending doom in our future.

The first fight of the night: Melissa versus Raichel. Melissa is embarrassed and sorry for how she acted. Raichel is pissed that Melissa ruined her chances with Brad. In the end, Raichel apologizes for how she acted, but she never admits she was wrong. Instead, she keeps shoveling it onto Melissa, who can't seem to find a way to shake the blame.

Michelle is up next, effectively splitting the group in half. On one side is mostly Jackie and Stacey, both of whom hate Michelle. Jackie is insulted by her comments on the show, while Stacey calls her manipulative. Michelle, in tears, gets defended by Lisa and Ashley H., saying that she was sarcastic and no one got her sense of humor. Even Chris had to butt in on this one to make the two stop ganging up on her.

Then it's a tale of two Ashleys. First, Ashley S. and how sad she looked when Brad sent her packing. Apparently she's happy she's emotionally bruised because she's that much more ready for the next guy.

Ashley H., on the other hand, has new hair and a new attitude. She's ready to move on (even though Chris Harrison won't let her), she just wants to confront Brad about some things so that she can have full closure.

Ashley's wish is Chris' command as he brings Brad out from backstage, bringing a collective silence over the room. Here he is again, rejecting more women, unsure of how to react to everyone who he hurt over his saga of love-finding.

Apparently Brad calls his newfound love his "significant other" (which tells us he's really in it for the long haul, right?), but other than that, everyone is significantly tame. After that, it was the gag reel and a preview for the mess that will be next week. Disappointed? A little. But at least there was a little drama, though--I can't believe I'm saying this--I felt a little bad for Michelle. She's not all bad!

The Bachelor airs Mondays at 8/7c on ABC.

(Photo courtesy of ABC)

Follow David on Twitter: @DavidMcAlpine