By Lindsay Strouse

 

The Marriage Ref returns this week with a hilarious group of celebrity judges: Actors Tracy Morgan and Nathan Lane and comic Kathy Griffin. These are three people that I am completely excited to watch bash other couple’s arguments (I just would never want to have them bash mine!).

 

Issue: Home Alone
The first couple of the night is Rosalyn and Craig. Just like any wife, Rosalyn wants her husband to spend more time with her. Her solution? Have him stand in a room…silent…as she plays solitaire on the computer. Kathy justifies Rosalyn’s reasoning by declaring the desire all women hold—we like to make sure you’re there and paying attention to us…just don’t bother us.

 

But hold on, folks. Before you start siding with poor Craig, listen to part two. Craig likes to go fishing. He thinks the best way to spend time with her is to take his completely unwilling wife fishing with him! Nathan thinks Craig is a LITTLE less wrong, seeing as she would actually be allowed to talk if they went fishing together. Kathy sides with the wife and Tracy’s answer is undecipherable…he’s too busy drooling over the wife! The call: Craig wins on the solitaire issue and Rosalyn wins on the fishing issue. Best way to solve the problem? Host Tom Papa provides the couple with a pack of playing cards. Yay, now they can ignore each other…together!

 

Issue: After-Wife
John and Theresa have been married for ten years. While John is struggling to find one minute to spend with his wife, she’s pushing him aside for the dead. Yep, she’s a ghost hunter. Kathy doesn’t care what they decide to do—but as long as Theresa is hunting ghosts, she can go track down the ghost of Kathy’s career (I wish I could take the credit for that, but Kathy’s a step ahead of me). Both Kathy and Nathan sympathize with the lonely husband and side with him. Tracy goes with the wife because he loves Ghost Busters. Good reasoning, Tracy. As for the call: life is short, let’s focus on the LIVING. John wins!

 

Issue: Casserole or casse-gross?
Kevin and Shante have been married for 7 years and together for 10. Even stronger than their love is Shante’s desire to make Kevin eat her green bean casserole. She wants them to eat healthier by eating this, but she doesn’t even know what kind of meat is in it! Uh…I think that should be a warning sign. Honestly, from the looks of it, I wouldn’t touch it if you paid me. Kevin actually puts his thoughts on the casserole quite poetically: “I will not eat it for my spouse, I will not eat it with a mouse, I want the green bean casserole out of my house!”

 

Nathan sides with the husband out of the sheer fact that Shante doesn’t even know what’s in the dish! Kathy goes with the wife and says, “She’s been asking you to eat it for ten years. Just try the damn thing!” Tracy sides with me and Nathan and goes with the husband. Just for the record, I would like to point out how RIDICULOUS it is that the most heated discussion on the show so far has been about a GREEN BEAN CASSEROLE. The call: Papa agrees with Kathy and says Kevin needs to at least try it. If he takes a bite, Papa will reverse his decision and let the husband win. No such luck, Kevin doesn’t let the casserole get anywhere near his mouth.

 

Issue: Betty Blooper
David and Michael have been married for one year and are very much in love. However, this is one woman in their lives that keeps getting in the way. That woman is Betty Boop. David insists on keeping a huge statue of my girl Betty in the kitchen but Michael sees it as trashy and wants it out. Kathy spits out the incredible amount of knowledge she knows about the gay community (even more than Nathan Lane!) and is allowed to make the final call. Nathan is anti-Boop, Kathy is pro-Boop and Tracy is pro-Boop (mainly because it rhymes with something else). After hearing all the panelists, Kathy sides with David—Betty Boop gets to stay!

 

If you need a laugh or a way to make you feel better about your own relationship, don’t miss The Marriage Ref next Thursday at 10/9c on NBC.

 

(Image courtesy of NBC)

 

Follow Lindsay at twitter.com/LindsayStrouse

 

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