by Chandra Clewley

 

 

The Real Housewives of DC rolls again this week as the plot thickens like a day old pot of coffee.  I actually am really enjoying this new spin off of the franchise, while my Twitter feed would have me believe that perhaps I am the only one! Could it be that I enjoy the drama before the drama? I was a constant viewer of Orange County before the politics of who Slade was sleeping with. I loved New York when Jill and Bethenny snarked in their Hampton’s pool.  I even kind of liked the uncomfortable misery of DeShawn Snow throwing a charity event that drummed up zero charity in Hotlanta. Perhaps, I am just one of the viewers that like to get to know the girls and see their lives, before they all start fighting with each other? But, I digress.

 

We see Lynda with her family in this episode. She doesn’t seem to want to be involved with the Salahi’s (smart girl…)and turns down an invitation to stomp grapes at their winery when invited.

 

Stacie talks a little about her biological parents, her mother, a Caucasian woman, treats Stacie as if she is her “dirty little secret” which, come to find out, she is, and will not give her any information about her biological father. Stacie needs to ditch that troll and just search with the information she has, who was a Nigerian Peace Corps volunteer nine months before she was born?  Stacie and her husband Jason are also getting more entangled with the Salahi’s as we will come to see. 

 

Lot’s going on with Mary this week; she helps with an event for Ted Gibson’s salon. Everyone is loving all over Ted Gibson, like he is their pet rock. Michaele just about mounts him in a full body hug when she sees him, and Mary almost open mouth kisses the man. What’s Ted Gibson got that makes him so hot? Michaele also helps with the grand opening party, by contributing wine in a very “product placement” sort of way, which turns Mary off.  Gauche! Mary and Cat call Michaele and Tareq “social climbers”. No, duh! Speidi of Washington DC, much?

 

Later, when everyone shares a limo ride to Oasis Winery, (Cat, Jason, Stacie, Jason, and Mary) they get to talking about Jason’s (Ted Gibson’s salon partner) party crasher experience with the Salahi’s.  This story is so rich; I don’t know how to fit it in to this recap, but essentially: 

 

• Jason and Ted were invited to attend Black Caucus Dinner with Salahi’s

• When they arrive, there is only one ticket

• They all SNEAK in a side door

• Salahi’s suggest they begin looking for empty places at tables where people have not shown up and then take napkin out of water glass and set it down to reserve a spot.

• Salahi’s get caught by Presidential security team and are asked to leave as Ted and Jason look on.

• Later, Ted and Jason see Salahi’s in VIP area with President!

 

Everyone is floored. Cat calls is brazen.  Stacie and Jason can’t understand why someone would go anywhere they were not wanted or invited. Mary is upset because she is trying to help Ted and Jason out by introducing them to the right people and they are making a mockery of it by sneaking in to events with the Salahi’s. While they are driving to the Virginia winery, Stacie misses a call from Tareq Salahi, asking them to take a side entrance to the winery because his mother and a crew of press are out front. The Salahi’s have hired private security including Doberman’s to guard the winery while they crush grapes because apparently they just finished up a lawsuit that was put against them by Tareq Salahi’s mother, who wanted him OUT of the family winery business. Looks like she lost, because now it’s HIS winery.

 

 Stacie and Jason are wondering what the hell is going on, and don’t want to go anywhere where they are in danger. Cat is upset and says “Nothing adds up with these guys!” Mary keeps quiet admitting in the interview segment that she just wanted to find out what was really going on out there at the winery.

 

Once they pull up, no one wants to mention the swat team and guard dogs around the perimeters and Cat is bothered by it.  Michaele is all “light and love” about the entire thing, while Cat is asking them what is going on. They ask to put it behind them, but Cat is like: It just happened 5 minutes ago! Tareq suggests (or tells, if you ask Cat) everyone to head over to the grape stomp, where there are 10 boxes of red seedless table grapes ready for a good stomping. They aren’t even wine grapes! Odd. 

 

Cat sits this one out, with a bad taste in her mouth and makes bitchy comments. Michaele’s assistant Jen actually calls her out for being bitchy (and it seems like EVERYONE agrees) and Cat is even more annoyed. In part, the viewer totally understands Cat’s stance, but at what point is she just going to let it go and have some fun while she is there? Jason and Cat eventually leave the vineyard early, and do not do the tasting, that Cat has asked about earlier “This time are we drinking wine or is it just more beer in wine glasses?” alluding back to their polo day.

 

Once they leave, everyone is in a weird mood. Cat has called out the elephant in the room, and it has unsettled everyone.  So, as the group is sitting in the tasting room, Michaele just sort of lays into on Mary.  Poor Mary is guilty by association when Michaele wants to know what Cat’s problem is. Mary defends Cat and says she is just painfully honest and vocal (which she got a taste of earlier, when Cat was insulting everything in Mary’s best friend’s store).

The conversation jumps to the party crash, and the Salahi’s insist everyone had tickets and then Michaele starts in on Lynda accusing her of being anorexic (maybe because YOU ARE, Michaele?). Mary defends Lynda.

Then it goes to Mary talking poorly about Michaele. At this point, Mary should have stood her butt up and walked, because this conversation is going nowhere fast, but she notices (how could you not?) a bright red Tareq on the other side of Michaele. Mary looks at him and knows he has something to say so she pushes him to talk….and what comes next….well, I guess we will see next week!

 

Catch an all new Real Housewives of DC next Thursday at 10/9 c on Bravo

 

(Image courtesy of Bravo)

 

Follow Chandra at http://twitter.com/ChandraClewley

 

For more Real Housewives of DC, visit Sirlinksalot.net