by David McAlpine
 
Last week on The Bachelorette, Kasey revealed his heart and his tattoo to Ali, neither of which went over very well. After his two-on-one date with Justin, the wrestler took another opponent down as Kasey was sent packing from the competition. In an anti-climactic ending, Chris N. was the second guy sent home, leaving seven to vie for Ali's heart.
 
Now that everyone left has had ample air time and we all know who they are, Ali can breathe a sigh of relief, because everything is just going fantastic, right? Wrong. Chris Harrison comes into Ali's room at the beginning of the episode with a phone in his hand, saying that he has a bombshell, but he's not the one who can drop it. Instead he calls Jessie, who was a fellow Bachelor contestant with Ali on Jake's season. The most reliable source? Probably not, but we're rolling with it.
 
Cut to Jessie, who brings out the magic phrase that is now absolutely synonymous with this show: someone isn't on the show "for the right reasons." Apparently, Justin, who lives in Toronto, where Jessie lives, has a girlfriend back home. Cue to camera to push out and there's his girlfriend of almost two years, Jessica, sitting right beside her. Jessie hands off the phone and Jessica spills everything, including that Justin told her he was just going on the show to get famous and that he has a third girlfriend. This girl even helped him prepare for the show! After the phone call, a simple Facebook picture of happy Justin and Jessica to tip Ali over the edge.
 
At first she plays it cool, knocking on the guys' suite with Chris, walking in, asking everyone how they're doing. Then it comes out with a lash of venom, and Justin doesn't want to take it. He gets up, gets his wallet and his passport and books it (well, as fast as he can with his foot), Ali hot on his tail, demanding answers. After his embarassing walk through bushes and over walls (and the comeback of the night, courtesy of Kirk: "His wrestling name shouldn't be Rated R, his T-shirt should just read 'Justin Liar.'"), Justin finally sits down face to face with Ali. At first, he tried to fight it by pinning the crazy on Jessica, but then he started to admit that he didn't have that strong of feelings for Ali.
 
As Justin makes his exit, perhaps the most dramatic in Bachelor history, ABC adds that magic touch that they always have by playing the ocuntless voicemails he left Jessica, presumably during the taping of the show, telling her how much he wants her to be his wife. Special, right? Thus ends the saga of Rated R, and we can resume with the rose-giving.
 
Speaking of rose-giving, the first one-on-one date this week is with Ty, who gets to go with Ali to the Turkish baths. Romantic, no? Actually not, according to Ali, who tries really hard to explain the historical significance of the baths, but comes across as plain unsuccessful. Instead, it just ends up with Ty and Ali getting half naked and rubbing each other in a big stone house filled with steam. Oh, and a rose for Ty, of course.
 
Back at the house, Frank really wants a second one-on-one, because he's concerned Ali is mad at him. He thinks that, since he got the first one-on-one, their connection has fizzled and he wants to fix that. Cut to Craig, who has yet to have a one-on-one. The date card comes and the group date ends up being Chris, Kirk, Craig and Roberto, leaving Frank with the one-on-one and Craig with a sour taste in his mouth. On the group date, the four guys end up facing off in oil wrestling (which apparently is a national sport in Turkey) against four Turkish wrestlers. And they lose miserably.

So what better consolation than to wrestle each other? Craig is out to win, because the winner gets coveted one-on-one time with Ali instead of a rose. In the end, Craig ends up winning the mini-tournament, getting that special time with Ali. However, it probably ended up being more disastrous than anything for him, because at least without the one-on-one time, he could have played the mysterious card. Unlucky for him, he goes on the mini-date with Ali and sparks don't fly, at least from what I can see. There's a boat and there's fireworks, but there's really no connection here.

Fast forward to Frank's one-on-one, which is much more animated on Ali's part. All Frank can talk about, though, is how he wants her to himself. Really? Did he not know the show before he came on it? Come on now. Frank warms up a little more once Ali comes out in her belly dancer costume and he buys a rug, so he's feeling fully Turkish. Things get serious over dinner, where Ali starts to nitpick at Frank and see what's inside his head. She starts to get skittish and says that their relationship scares her, but she gives him the rose anyway.

So after all this drama, Ali decided that she doesn't need a cocktail party, because she's already made up her mind (which makes this much less complicated). In another shocking (I'm being way sarcastic here, folks) elimination, Craig was left without a rose. He was incredibly sweet in his goodbye to Ali and she was pretty civil to him as he was exiting. However, now the fun begins with five very attractive, very attached guys fighting for her heart.

Tune in next Monday at 9/8c to see which guys get the next rose only on The Bachelorette on ABC!

(Photo courtesy of ABC)

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