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Millionaire Matchmaker Season 3: Episode 3 Recap

Posted on 02/02/2010 by Gina in Millionaire Matchmaker

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Millionaire Matchmaker Season 3

 

by Michael J. Lamp

 

Tonight, on Millionaire Matchmaker, Patti welcomed a classic "shy guy" along with a familiar face, but not familiar in the friendly way. When Destin breaks the news to Patti that Shauna is interested in working with her again, Patti pretty much sums up the emotion that all the viewers are feeling: "The Botox bitch is back."

 

Shauna visits Patti at the office and claims to have changed her ways. She seems far too willing to play by Patti's rules. Even when Patti disses Shauna, telling her she needs to be "feminized," there is barely any retort on Shauna's side. Very peculiar. There's a storm a comin', for sure...

 

Next Patti visits Michael, who didn't even send in a tape. Either he's really ugly or he's really lazy. Patti's instant swooning over Michael rules out the first option, so maybe he's just a lazy bum. But he's very young to be a millionaire; maybe he's not lazy? So confusing. After a few minutes of chatting with Patti, it become obvious that Michael is a hard-working guy when it comes to business, but (like so many - blah, blah, blah) he needs to work on himself.

 

Back at the office, Patti tells the Millionaire crew that a mixer simply won't do for this duo. They need something special, something private. They need...the 2-WAY MIRROR!

 

Patti introduces Shauna and Michael. Can you guess what happens next? Shauna makes hilariously lame and obvious passes at Michael. Luckily, he rejects her straightaway each time.

 

Michael's prospects are all some variation of the same girl: blonde, moderately tall and moderately dumb. Patti throws one cougar into the mix, prompting Michael to totally zing Shauna: "She's, like, older than you!" Ouch! Michael settles on Natasha, the girl that came in wearing a very "cover me up" jacket that was quickly ripped off, uncovering a very tight, very un-business cocktail dress. Convenient.

 

"Determined" to find Shauna a man, Patti pulls out all the stops with her possible dates. First we meet Barry, whom Michael jokingly refers to as ‘Santa,' then Mark, a handsome guy in his early 50s. Shauna is painfully predictable, though, and falls right into Patti's trap by taking a shine to Zack, the actor with a hot body but a boring personality. Personality doesn't seem to matter much to Shauna. After some gentle nudging from Patti, Shauna agrees to go on a date with Mark, bypassing the young hottie. Could she be turning over a new leaf? I can't imagine.
Michael and Natasha's date begins romantically enough. He brings flowers, she gushes, they have a little canoe race. But then, at dinner, Natasha goes a little bonkers and - for reasons unknown - begins to rap. Michael is instantly turned off, and Natasha never really had a chance from there.

 

Mark sends a red dress to Shauna's hotel room, in preparation for their date. It's weird that he wants her to wear the dress he sent, but it's still at least a semi-sweet gesture. Shauna makes fun of the dress (shocking!) and refuses to put it on. She meets Mark outside the hotel, where a limo is waiting.

 

Just when it seems Shauna is going to go through with the date, she completely freaks out, loses a heel and runs back through the revolving door and into the hotel room. A few choice words are spoken ("That guy's a hundred!"), and we are left with a sad shot of Mark...all alone. Patti calls to check on him, and he seems to be a good sport about the whole situation. Better him that me.

 

Patti calls Natasha and finds out that Michael hasn't called her since the date. No surprise there. Michael visits the office and confirms the lack of sparks. Patti tells him he needs to be more of a hunter. And that's that.

 

Shauna comes into the office, apparently to make amends. As if. Patti has a new guy for her, but Shauna won't go on the date until she sees a picture of him. This prompts Patti to go on one of her classic tirades, eventually ending the episode much like it began, with Patti lovingly wishing Shauna the best: "Sorry, bitch, you're outta the club!"

 

Oh, Patti...

 

 

Millionaire Matchmaker airs Tuesdays at 10pm ET on Bravo.

 

(Image courtesy of Bravo)

 


Follow Michael at twitter.com/mjlamp

 

For more Millionaire Matchmaker links, visit SirLinksALot.net


  


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