By David McAlpine

Last week on The Bachelorette, Jake made a last ditch attempt to take Wes out by exposing what America already knew. Well, except for Jillian, who sent Jake packing (again)—then let Ed come back into the competition (scripted shocker!). In the end, young’ins Michael and Jesse were left without a rose and the final four jetted off to Madrid.

Now as Ed, Kiptyn, Reid and Wes get to spend a week in Madrid with Jillian for mucho amor, I’m left to wonder if anyone left in this competition is serious about staying with this girl. Jillian’s blog via People keeps insisting everything turns out, but considering this girl has kept Wes in every single week…I don’t know if I exactly trust her judgment. However, we’ll get to see more of her wonderful intuition at work when she has to pick one guy this week to join her in the “fantasy suite.”

On the first date, Jillian and Kiptyn set out to explore Madrid, and Jillian lets us know (again) that she’s worried Kiptyn is too good for her. Considering the rumor online is that he was paid more than any other guy to be on the show and his mother had to flight to keep her face to a sane judgment level, I’d be inclined to agree. Anyway, Kiptyn and Jillian start dishing about proposals, and Kiptyn drops the truth: he thinks two months may be rushing an engagement. You can see the intense fear in Jillian’s eyes, but she agrees to “take it slow.”

The two hit the dance floor in flamenco outfits, which apparently doesn’t give him enough room for his junk. Ouch. They both prove they can’t dance, so they give up and head to dinner, which seemingly consists of appetizers and (what else?) lots and lots of wine. Surprisingly, she turns down the fantasy suite offer with Kiptyn (maybe trying really hard to “take it slow”?), saying she’s not ready yet. And oh, is that yet loaded with “I really want to but I don’t want to scare you away because I want an engagement and a wedding and babies.” So, instead, they cuddle and drink more.

Jillian hooks up with Reid in Seville and she can’t stop talking about how much she likes him. It almost makes me wonder why she didn’t rave about him like this at the beginning of the season—oh, that’s right, she was raving about Jake and Michael, both of whom she cut. Oops.

The two head to a Spanish deli and showcase their less than fantastic language skills when ordering their food. Reid started probing about her other hometown dates, but Jillian would give up any info. Instead, she kept the focus on how he was feeling (i.e. if he wants to have her babies). Reid also keeps a strong poker face (or just isn’t that interested in being committed), but he does tell her she smells good. No surprise, he doesn’t land the Fantasy Suite date, either.

Jillian sees Ed the next day in Seville and the two partake in a carriage ride, where Ed explains his “reason” for coming back, which seemed like one big circular version of “the producers told me so.” He pines about not being able to take her on a hometown date, which I can say, being a Chicagoan myself, would have been a great date, but mentions the magic word: kids. Timeframe? Two to three years. Since Reid and Kiptyn haven’t even been able to utter “proposal,” you can imagine how much Jillian liked this. Still, surprisingly, no Fantasy Suite with Ed, either.

So, as Jillian travels to Barcelona to meet up with Wes, I can’t help but get really excited that Wes is going to be the mystery man who has bared the brunt of ABC’s tease-tastic semi-spoilers of the season, the one who can’t get it up for Jillian! Everything starts out great, especially since Wes is so comfortable in Spain because of his number one single in Chihuahua, Mexico. Right.

However, just as fast as The Bachelorette could get me excited, the date starts to turn south. Wes doesn’t want to budge about staying in Austin, then he tells Jillian that he came on the show because his manager thought he could use the publicity…but now he’s sticking around. Strike one.

The conversation continued, and it became crystal clear that Jillian may have massively embarrassed herself in front of millions of viewers, Wes slips and calls Laurel his “girlfriend,” then half-assedly tries to cover it up with an “I mean…ex-girlfriend.” Strike two.

The Fantasy Suite card arrives at the table and Wes gives Jillian that “trust me, I know what I’m doing” look and says, “I think we should, actually.” Wes finally crosses the line enough to make Jillian realize that he’s been playing her the entire time and she turns him down and ends the date. Strike three.

At the rose ceremony, Kiptyn seems to think he’s going (or maybe he’s just ready to go), but Wes delivers the quote of the night: “If it’s me, you boys know that I will be back home, having lots of sex”—until he delivers this whopper on the limo ride home (you know, since Jillian finally got some sense into her): “Them boys couldn’t so much as get a nibble back in Texas. Everybody’s going to know my name.” Quality material right there.

I don’t know about Wes (or his manager), but I know the majority of the people who watch this show are women who want to see a happy ending, so abusing a girl who already got her heart broken once in front of that audience probably isn’t the best way to launch a career. Perhaps an US Weekly blurb in the near future, but platinum country record? I don’t think so.

Tune in next week for more betrayal (“I’m sorry I hurt you”) and shock (“I can’t believe this happened!”) as Jillian picks her final two suitors on The Bachelorette, Monday on ABC at 8/7c.

(Photo courtesy of ABC)

For more The Bachelorette Links visit Sirlinksalot.net