by Kylene Hamulak

 

With the finale confetti barely done falling upon the dance floor of my other favorite reality dance show to blog about, the ninth season of So You Think You Can Dance begins with auditions in Dallas and New York. I will confess, as I always do, that I not only do I NOT think I can dance, but I've never watched an episode of this show. Now, some of my favorite dancers on Broadway are SYTYCD veterans, so it's time for me to take notice. You know how they say those that can't do, teach? Well, those who can't dance, blog about it. So let's get this season started...

 

And what better place to start than New York City! You know this works - dancers have a chance to impress Mary Murphy, Nigel Lithgoe and a special guest judge (Tyce Diorio in NY) and will either be sent home, sent to Vegas, or asked to participate in a choreography round.

 

Amelia Lowe (18 - Butler, NJ): Fashions her style from the 1920's to an almost creepy degree; her dance is like watching a silent movie, and the judges eat it up - she's going straight to Vegas.

 

Toshihiko Nakazawa (26 - Niigata, Japan): Wearing a jumpsuit as red as his crazy hair, this transport from Japan gives an explosive performance that gets him a comparison to Twitch and an invitation to stick around for the choreography audition.

 

Austin Freeman (21 - Long Branch, NJ): Brings "Mr. Wiggles" to the show dressed like every nerd I've ever seen on a sitcom, and within seconds we learn that he wants to be "a celebrity". We know how this will end. And it does. On the stage.

 

After a montage of some of the dancers who make New York City the best place in the world for dance, we meet a guy who flips from Philly. Does that make him a phlipper?

 

Shafeek Westbrook (22 - North Philadelphia, PA): Moves around the floor like a gymnast, as if his entire body is suspended by some unseen wires determining his every move with perfect fluidity; judges love it and send him to Vegas.

 

The season's first choreography round comes next, and after 20 minutes, our friend Toshihiko leaves the theater, explaining that he can't lift, so he can't stay. Of the 36 dancers in the round, ten receive their tickets to Vegas.

 

Day 2 of New York auditions begins.

 

Leo Reyes (21 - Brooklyn, NY): Touching story of a son who's mom's suicide attempt made him realize he's been taking his talent for granted - he just wants to give her something to be proud of. Of course, he does - he's going to Vegas.

 

After a montage of terrible dancers - trust me, you'll have to flush your eyes out if you dare to catch a glimpse of the guy in the green and black spandex - we meet a ballet dancer from Switzerland who wants to do more.

 

Chehon Wespi-Tschopp (22 - Zurich, Switzerland): His routine is fierce - if they didn't want him, we could just give him a job selling papes at the Nederlander Theater. That won't be necessary though - he's going to Vegas.

 

After the day 2 choreography round, an additional 11 dancers joined the New York auditioners who would compete again in Las Vegas, for a total of 39.

 

Next stop? Dallas, Texas, where Lil'C joined Mary and Nigel for auditions.

 

Bree Hafen (29 - McKinney, TX): Mom shows up with two adorable children and talent to back up her dreams. I'm not going to lie - when Nigel asked her young son to deliver her ticket to Vegas to her as she performed, I got a little teary eyed. Then her toddling daughter got her chance to perform, and I about died from the sweetness. And the fact that she's already a better dancer than I could ever be.

 

After a quick break, we see a different side of Texas via an Exorcist and a Zombie. I don't even know what's going on with the voices and the eyes and the...well, everything, but you're kind of creeping me out, SYTYCD.

 

Stepheon "The Zombie" Stewart (21 - Katy, TX): He plays the zombie role well, contorting his body in ways that aren't natural, but are certainly entertaining; he's going to Vegas.

 

Hampton "The Exorcist" Williams (21 - Richarson, TX): Tells the crowd he will cleanse them through his dancing, and his methods seem to work cause the room is on their feet and Mary is crying; Nigel suggests that he's not only an artist, but also possibly a genius - he's going to Vegas.

 

At the end of Day 1, five dancers had earned tickets straight to Vegas, while five more joined them after the choreography round. After a zombie, an exorcist and two adorable kids on the first day, who could show up on the second day?

 

Daniel Baker (23, San Francisco, CA): Austrailian native by way of San Francisco who pursued ballet to get a sponsored visa so he could come to America; when he steps on stage wearing only shorts, I'm ready to send him to Vegas. The judges, however, require him to dance. And THEN they invite him.

 

Also doing well? The girls of Dallas. We don't get to learn their names or stories, but at least we know there are some. And then we meet another a guy who could be Austin from NYC's Dallas counterpart.

 

Sam Shreffler (21 - Lubbock, TX): As soon as Sam tells us that he's on the autistic spectrum, I'm rooting for him. He calls his dance "lyrical freestyle," and I start to wonder if he could actually do something with that. He can't. I mean, he gets a lot of credit for being able to go up on stage, but he dances sort of like I do. And he reminds me a little of McLovin'.

 

Next we meet a bunch of dancers for whom the show has had a huge impact. As one by one they related how influential it's been and how it inspires them, we meet one who says the show crushes people, and that he would bash the show if he could. Let's find out the rest of this story.

 

Von Kipper (22 - Houston, TX): He's pretty high on himself, but there's a lot of video of him dancing while wearing a hamster suit. Oh yes. You read correctly. And as he continues to tell Cat how much he does NOT want to be on the show and how "super dope" he is already, I'm starting to lose interest. The judges are, too. They basically tell him to focus more on the dancing and less on his mouth.

 

Here's what I DON'T understand - Nigel seemed genuinely pissed off at Von's attitude and what he had said to Cat. Even Mary remarks that the guy just wanted to get on TV. Why, then, did we GIVE him that? If he had been good enough to make it controversial, well, that's one thing. But this guy wasn't entertaining, and neither was the attempt to stir things up.

 

Jarell Rochelle (22 - Huntsville, TX): Another dancer doing it for his mom, hoping she can see his dream come true before she goes blind. Nigel invites her to sit in his chair for a great view of her son's "delightful" performance...and then asks her to deliver to Jarell a ticket to Vegas.

 

An additional seven dancers are sent to Vegas from the choreography round, and with that, auditions move on to Los Angeles. I'm sure we'll be meeting some interesting characters there, including special guest judge Jesse Tyler Ferguson of ABC's Modern Family! That's enough for me to tune in!

 

 

So You Think You Can Dance airs Wednesdays at 8/7c on FOX.

 

(Image courtesy of FOX)